Can I Help You?

Earlier today, I went to Victoria’s Secret to purchase some undies. SCANDALOUS, I know.  The store was pretty empty, as it was 11 AM- apparently not high time for underwear shopping. As I walked into the store, I saw two women chatting among the emptiness, waiting for some poor sucker to walk in and hear their shpeal.  Alas, they smiled at me and hurried over as they had acquired their target.

Shopgirls: Good morning! Welcome! What brings you in today?

[What brings me in today?  Oh, just looking for a sandwich…am I hot or cold?  I am here to buy some undies, are you really gonna make me say it?  FINE.]

Val: Morning, I need some undies.

SG: Oh great! Do you need help picking them out?

[Has anyone ever answered yes to this question? I’m 22 years old!  No, I don’t need help buying underwear. Who needs help buying underwear?  I’m sure everyone has their preferences, as I do, and don’t find many reasons to stray from the comfort zone in this area.  Just let me pick out my undies in peace.]

V: No thanks, I think I’m good.

SG: Do you think you’ll be buying a bra today? When was the last time you were measured?

[I have always felt that the bra measuring at VS should take place upon request only, but I find myself getting molested with the measuring tape every time.  Again, thanks ladies, I’ve got my boob size under control for the time being.]

V: Nah I’m all set for today. I’m just gonna look around. Thanks girls!

SG: No problem, let us know if we can help you with anything!

Now, one might assume that this ended the hoovering, but let me assure you, these chicks are persistent.  As I looked through the tables and picked out a few pairs [5 for $26, what a bargain], they watched my every move, commented on what I was picking out, and needless to say, annoyed the hell out of me. While my only retail experience was as a long time liquor store employee where the words “retail” and “work” were used in the lightest sense, I feel that I have enough experience as a customer to ask a question that I cannot possibly be the only one asking: what on earth is with all the nagging?  I am not one to toot my own horn, but I was damn good at my liquor store job.  At the cash register, I was charming, funny, cheerful, and efficient.  A huge hit with newbies and regulars alike.  On the floor, I was helpful as helpful could be, even if I was making up a lot of my liquor suggestions. Nagging was never a part of it.  If I spotted a customer who looked a little lost, a simple “can I help you find something?” would generally suffice.  If the answer was no, or they seemed to be on a mission, see ya later!  If you need me, you have legs and eyes…you can find me.  Following people around, commenting on their every move, “helping” them pick out items that they seem to have a pretty good grasp on selecting- so unnecessary!  Be a happy, helpful employee. Be available, not overbearing. Cause who wants to be stressed out by store employees? No one.

Am I a huge weirdo? Do overbearing retail employees drive you bonkers, or do you enjoy the help? Comment and let me know!

6 comments

  1. Can I Get ur Number??

    you’re so east coast, I LOVE IT. I’m the same way… I actually just don’t respond to them OR give them a no-teeth smile (bitchy girl move I learned in my sorority — totally works!). It’s wicked awkward, but who cares – you’ll never see them again. mad love to BOSTON!!!!

    Reply
      • Can I Get ur Number??

        omg, i went to college in small town west texas. my first weekend there i went to buy A pair of jeans… should take, what? 5 minutes? took 15 to get out of there because everyone wanted to know everything about me! southerners and their damn hospitality

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